Tips for Living Wicca: Set Up a Shrine

A shrine and an altar are two different things. An altar is more of an elaborate set-up for formal ritual and extended workings, whereas a shrine is more of a simple place to go regularly to honor a deity, spirit, ancestor or whatever you hold as sacred.

Even if you have an altar, a small shrine can be a good addition to your home somewhere because the use of them is much more focused. It gives you a quiet, uncluttered place to go and attune with deity.

When I was a young Wiccan, I read Scott Cunnhingham’s book Wicca and took his advice—about 25 years later and I still start my day with a visit to my shrine, a short prayer, an offering and a brief meditation. This routine has not only brought me a great deal of peace, but I feel it’s been the most powerful way to form a relationship with my Gods, more than any elaborate ritual.

My Tip for You Today:

Set up a shrine. It doesn’t have to be elaborate—even if it’s just a candle, a cone incense burner and a bowl.

I go more into setting up shrines here:

Here’s my shrine:

Do you have a shrine? Tell me about yours!

Tips for Living Wicca: Purify your Space

Energy can cling. This is why when I learned Witchcraft I was taught to use rough cut stones and avoid smooth, polished tumbled stones. The rough surfaces are better for clinging to energy.

With this in mind, can you imagine how much energy can cling to dirt, dust, bumpy walls, popcorn ceilings, carpets, drapes and other surfaces? Here’s a good rule of thumb: if dust will stick to it, or static will stick to it, then energy sticks to it.

Negative energy building up in our homes is akin to the proverbial frog in a pot of cold water. See, if you put the frog in hot water it’d realize right away the change in temperature and hop out. But if you put it in cool water and slowly heat the water, the poor frog would sit there and be simmered to death because he wouldn’t even notice the temperature gradually rising. Sometimes you don’t even realize how badly negative energy can build up until you clear it away.

My Tip for You Today: 

Purify your space to get rid of negative energy. Wipe things down with a salt-water solution—wipe the walls with it if you like. Sprinkle salt on the rugs and vacuum. Take the curtains down or gather up the fabrics and wash them with a ¼ cup of salt in the rinse water. Vacuum the upholstery and spray it with a salt water solution.

Another great way to break up and rid yourself of negative energy in a room is to fume it with thick incense smoke of sage, sandalwood or some other cleansing incense (please be sure to open windows).

Once your place is purified you may find yourself breathing and sleeping a lot easier, and the overall mood lifted.

Tell me— have you ever allowed negative energy build up around you? What effect did it have?

Tips for Living Wicca: Create Something Meaningful

The act of creation is a powerful thing. My husband noticed how relaxed I got when I indulged in the arts—painting, scrapbooking, sculpting—anything creative, even if it was just doing coloring books with the kids. Now, when I get tense, stressed, overworked or when I seem wound up he reminds me to take a creativity break.

It reminds me how important it is to human nature to be creative and to have an outlet for expression.

My Tip for You Today: Create something!

You don’t have to be good at art— but it’s a fantastic way to express yourself and blow off steam. Play an instrument, write a poem, and draw a picture— whatever types of creative endeavors you enjoy.

You don’t even have to have a finished product worthy of display— just enjoy the process. You can take the pressure off yourself right away by telling yourself you’re going to burn it as an offering or bury it to return it to the earth. Now, you don’t have to worry about how good it is—just that it comes from the heart.

One of my paintings -- Acrylics on Watercolor Paper

When is the last time you stopped to be creative?

Tips for Living Wicca: Hold a Dark Moon Esbat

A lot of Wiccans hold Esbats at the full moon— and this is perfectly fine. But “esbat” doesn’t just refer to full moon rituals. “Esbat” is any moon ritual. The dark moon has entirely different energies than the full moon, or the crescent waxing moon. It’s interesting and important to explore these energies as well.

Dark moon Esbats are usually revolve around:

·         worshiping God/desses in their dark aspect

·         meditations that deal with exploring the dark side or solving mysteries

·         divination

·         powerful spells that involve destructive magic (banishings, breaking bad habits, etc.)  

My Tip for You Today: 

Plan a dark moon Esbat. If you’re trying to connect with a dark Goddess as I discussed yesterday, then both efforts can be combined.

You might start by familiarizing yourself and attuning with the dark phase of the moon—hold a devotional to your God/dess in his/her dark aspect if she has one, or simply meditate and allow your energy to interplay with the lunar energies this evening.

Have you ever held a Dark Moon Esbat? Share your experiences!

Tips for Living Wicca: Connect with a Dark Goddess

“Dark” gets a bad rep in today’s world. Spiritually, thanks to certain popular religions and fiction, dark is often associated with evil. When people say something is dark, it is usually not something admired. It’s equivalent to “negative” (another misunderstood word) or “malevolent”.

The reality is, dark is simply the counter-balance of light. The absence of light is dark; the absence of light is not inherently evil. Light is the obvious, what’s visible and out in the open. Dark is what’s under the surface, what’s hidden, what’s unknown. Perhaps it is this fear of the unknown that leads people to fear the dark, but it doesn't have to be that way. As a Wiccan, we strive for balance—and balance means facing both the light as well as looking into the shadows.

What’s in the shadows? Look at the scholar’s robs, the black belt—in the darkness we find wisdom. mastery. Strength. Working with the dark is not letting your most evil impulses and qualities go unchecked—it is actually learning to take your darkest impulses and qualities, taming them and learning to use them to bring yourself more into balance. Trying to bury them down in the dark doesn't make them go away.

My Tip for You Today: 

Consider connecting with a dark Goddess, for it is the Dark Goddesses who are best equipped to guide us into exploring and mastering our dark sides.

Begin by looking into dark Goddesses—Kali, Lilith, Inanna, Hecate, etc.; as you begin learning about them you’ll find yourself drawn to at least one of them. At that point study up on Her so you learn how to properly honor her, approach her, and so you’re ready of what she may expect from you. In time you may begin praying and worshiping her, and invite her into your life.

Do you feel the call of a Dark Goddess? Tell us about it.  

Tips for Living Wicca: Take a Stretch

The High Priest and Priestess of my coven required us to take classes before we discussed with them the possibility of joining. The class was free and ongoing, and would give those interested enough information on Wicca to make a truly informed decision— and it helped to weed out those who’s interest would wane.

There were almost 20 of us and my High Priest and Priestess really stumped everyone from the first class. They asked about what people did to nurture the mind. A lot of people were able to raise hands and talk about their studies. They asked what people did to nurture the spirit. Again, a lot of people were able to raise hands and talk about their meditations, rituals and such. And finally, they asked people what they did to nurture their bodies.

Most people didn’t raise their hands. In the crowd there were only a couple of people who were fitness conscious—a jogger, a weight lifter. Even they were a bit perplexed—what does this have to do with Wicca? Aside from my High Priest and Priestess, only two people ‘got it’—one vegetarian heavily into yoga, and another a karate teacher.

The fact is, mind-body-spirit is a kind of trinity. We need to focus on balancing the three. The smartest person in the world who has read all of the books and knows them inside-out is not balanced if you never get out of your reading chair. Likewise, you can meditate for hours on end, pray every day and hold rituals every night—you’re not balanced if in-between devotionals you fill your body with junk.

It’s not about being skinny, or attractive; it’s not about self-denial or deprivation. It’s about finding balance—finding a health balance for your body, and finding a balance between the mind/body/spirit connection.

Let me tell you, as someone who didn’t even have a kitchen, who survived on Doritos, Pepsi, chocolate bars and fast food, and who never bothered to exercise because I was so busy, I had a real ‘aha’ moment.

My Tip for You Today: 

Begin connecting to your body again if you’ve been neglecting it.

I’m not saying you need to rush out and join a gym or empty out the pantry and fill it with organic vegan foods; but you can start by taking a daily stretch. Stretch slowly, from head to toe, feel each muscle in turn. Put your awareness and energy into each muscle—what’s going on with them? Are they tense? Weak? How does stretching make them feel?

Don’t hurt yourself of course—remember, pain is your body’s way of saying ‘stop’. But do get into a routine of stretching daily, or a couple of times per day, and see the difference it makes in the way you feel.

When is the last time you took a good stretch?

Tips for Living Wicca: Admit a Mistake

One of the biggest faults I had to get over was how hard it was for me to ever admit a mistake. I grew up with a mom who was absolutely certain that she was always right, and who very deeply ingrained the idea into me that being wrong was a sign of major weakness and failure.

This is such a terrible burden to carry; it really is. Everyone is wrong sometimes, and if we don’t learn to accept that it can pretty much be the root of some major problems, and will usually take you down one of two roads.

One road it might take you down is that it will ruin your own self-worth. Your self-esteem is a fragile thing and if it hinges on always being right, then it’s going to get damaged every time that doesn’t happen (which is what happened to me). It may eventually get destroyed altogether. Being wrong doesn’t make you inferior or unworthy; it makes you human, and people aren’t going to think less of you for being wrong. They will think less of you if you can’t admit it.

The other road it may take you down is further and further into self-delusions about your own infallibility, and this can truly destroy relationships because it’s hard to be friends with or live with someone who thinks they are beyond reproach (which is what happened to my mother). There is no glory in always being right, especially when it’s a false victory.

My Tip for You Today: 

Begin practicing humility and admit a mistake that you’ve made. If it’s difficult, then it’s all the more reason you need to do it. If you feel it’s impossible because you’ve never made a mistake, or you attempt to redirect the blame to others (like my mother, who would say, “the only mistake I made was being too nice and letting people walk all over me.”), then you may need therapy— and I do not say that facetiously because yes, you have screwed up; if you think you haven’t you’re in denial.

The Charge of the Goddess tells us to “Keep pure your highest ideal; strive ever towards it; let naught stop you or turn you aside.” We can’t learn and grow if we can’t be honest with ourselves, and others. Delusions, lies, pride, etc., are all the kinds of things that act like a weight on a spiritual journey. Until you learn to dump some baggage you’re never going to reach the heights you hope to reach.  

You might start by writing about it—write a long letter about how you were wrong, and consider the ripples that it created in your life, and the lives of others. Really examine it, and ask yourself—is putting up a front really worth it?

Is there a mistake you made that you are afraid to admit?

Tips for Living Wicca: Declutter Your Space

I used to be messy. Like- really messy. Ugh, my small bedroom floor at home was a sea of clothes, papers, blankets, garbage. Every surface was covered in clutter. 

When I got my own apartment (well, it was a garage, an illegal rental really), my mess got even worse without my mother to nag me. 

Part of it I think was just rebellion. My parents were sucky parents. I love them, but yes they were. Partially abusive partially neglectful, and totally focused on all the wrong things, they made one huge mistake after another. One issue was that they were neat freaks. Having every single thing in its proper place, exactly right, was more important than anything else going on-- it was more important than spending time with me, more important than my feelings or my interests. 

When I was younger I never had to do chores. My mother did ALL the cleaning, always~ just stay out of her way. And pick up after yourself if you were done with something. A plate in the sink, a water splash on the counter, a smudge on the floor, or -- heaven forbid! -- the dish towel getting dirty or too wet-- well, these things were literally considered "disaster" (her word).

One time my friend knocked over a cup on the table-- the closest thing was my mother's clean, ironed dish towel hanging on the little rack. Before I could say anything, my friend grabbed it and blotted the red dyed juice to prevent it from spilling on the floor. I gasped and my eyes went wide, it was like she had just committed a felony right in front of me! And I knew, no matter what, I was going to get the blame big time (and boy, did I ever).

All they wanted me to do was watch TV and read-- clean activities. So if they came home, I could have the best news, like a great grade, or the worst news, like bullies had beaten me and stolen my lunch money-- but nothing mattered if the house wasn't perfect. Even though I was so artistic, painting was "too messy" and even drawing was messy because of the little eraser bits.

So between having no sense of responsibility and  just hating the very idea of cleaning and chores, I was a total slob. I'm embarrassed to say it now, but I set my altar up and invited my Gods and guardian spirits and ancestors into my home right there in the middle of a real disaster area.

Somewhere down the line, I realized just what a drain this mess was on me. And I began to learn about energy, and how negative energy was like dust-- how it held onto things, built up, got stored in little pockets, trapped. Getting my life together largely involved getting my home and stuff together. I approached it not with a concern for aesthetics, but for convenience-- order. Drop-box organizing. A place for everything. Categories. Labels. 

I had to be hard on myself to keep it up but eventually, it began to take. My life did get better when the mess got cleared and the negativity got cleansed-- it was like lifting a heavy weight off me, it freed me and it gave me more energy. By getting my environment in order, I was freed and had more energy to get my life in order. 


My Tip for You Today:

Look around your environment-- is there any clutter or any chaos that is getting in your way of getting ordered, organized and progressing in life? Maybe it's time to tackle it. In Wicca we strive for balance-- and being too messy or being too neat is not very balanced.

What's too much? I don't know-- that depends on you. Everyone's balancing point is different. For some people, a space that's functional and attractively decorated is the ideal balance-- for others, just having semi-categorized areas for stacks and just cleaning up the real dirt is all it takes. 

If you feel overwhelmed because it's a big job, and you've been too frazzled, depressed or stressed to deal with it (which, by the way, probably means you need it more than you think you do), then start small-- tackle a drawer today. A shelf tomorrow. One corner or one surface the day after that. Little by little it'll start coming together, and give you the strength and motivation to forge ahead. 

Do you struggle with keeping order in your life? 

Does it affect you like ripples in a pond? 

Talk to me...

Tips for Living Wicca: Practice Feeling Energy

At it's most basic level, every single thing is made up of energy.

It's amazing to think that under our flesh, inside the tissue, down past a cellular level, looking at smaller and smaller particles, eventually you come to nothing more than vibrations. All matter, all things in the universe, they all break down to nothing but a lot of vibrations.

In Wicca, it's important to learn to raise, direct and contain energy. That first comes with learning how to sense energy. This is an essential first step in Wiccan training, or training in any esoteric religion such as ours. 

Learning to sense energy is a major stepping stone. 


My Tip for You Today: Practice sensing energy. Grab something-- a plant, a friend, a pet. Relax, close your eyes, go into a semi-meditative state and hold your hands out.

Hold your hand over the object and let your senses pick something up. You may feel heat, coolness, tingling, radiating-- different things are going to give off different kinds of vibrations. So keep practicing with lots of different things. 

You might want to try some of the exercises found here: Wicca for Beginners: Energy Manipulation Exercises with Crystals

Have you been practicing with energy? 

What are your experiences?